I realize through the different movies, Netflix series, and books I have been reading, I have some severe female protagonist envy. This feeling has really put “penis envy” into perspective for me, and I feel like I understand now, guys, where that comes from. You can feel like you need to draw your power from your appendage; I get it! If you are slightly lacking in that department, it makes you feel insecure. You step up to a urinal, you think you are slightly below average, so you take a sneak peek at what talk dark and handsome is slanging next to you, and now you are even feeling worse about yourself!
Envious is exactly how I have been feeling about all of these amazing heroines I have been surrounding myself with. It’s like I am trying to convince myself size doesn’t matter while I’m watching these women with 9 inches of confidence and power take on the world!
Why do I do this? Do you do this too?
I have watched so many people harness some of this time in captivity for good. I have had friends post about new healthy habits they have started, money-saving goals they have done or taught themselves something new. I am feeling a bit stuck, and am wishing for a path, or storyboard, or a massive bulge of confidence to start my life anew.
I think that is really the key, fresh starts. It isn’t easy stopping a pattern or a habit, and that is what is so enticing and alluring of the female protagonists I long to be like. They typically have some major life event and decide they are not going to accept mediocrity any longer. Ya Ya! They just harness their inner diva and change what they don’t like about themselves. That is what I need, where are the female protagonist enhancement pills when you need them?
So, here’s what; today, July 31st, not tomorrow, August 1st, I am going to start being the lead in my story and not the supporting role. I think as wives and mothers and anyone who can feel like the secondary character in their relationship, we consider ourselves last. We don’t have a montage of focusing on our new business model, working out, spending money on ourselves without any guilt; we push it off until the end of the day and then we are too tired to start, or we always tell ourselves, “tomorrow, I’m going to get to this tomorrow.”
Nope! Not this leading lady. I’m starting today. Today I took time to write this blog, I’m going for a run, and I am going to do my mindfulness app to center myself and not feel guilty for telling Brooke mom needs to finish writing this before I help her with eggs for breakfast.
Woah, I think my protagonist just got a little bigger! 😉